


Tit for Tat

by shaneo6930



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: And fail to see the right ones, Comedy, Crack, F/F, Hilarity Ensues, M/M, They try to see each other naked, based on a friends episode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-24
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2019-06-15 11:43:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15412161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shaneo6930/pseuds/shaneo6930
Summary: One morning, Stiles accidentally sees Malia naked. This sets off a chain of events that leads to embarrassment for them and their friends.Inspired y the Friends episode The One With the Boobies





	Tit for Tat

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this fic was the product of a Friends binge, and all of the Teen Wolf fic I read. This has always been one of my favorite episodes of Friends, and I thought it would be fun to see the pack in this situation. 
> 
> I've borrowed a few lines of dialogue from the show and totally changed the ending. I hope it works.

Stiles yawned hard as he lumbered out of his bedroom and made a straight line for the kitchen. Without even opening his eyes, he emptied the day old coffee out of the pot and filled it with fresh water. He then reached up for the canister of coffee, only to be dismayed to find it too light.

“Fuck,” he sighed, realizing it was empty. Of course Scott put the empty can back in the cabinet and didn’t buy a new one. Sighing, he looked toward the door. Maybe he can steal a bit from Lydia and Malia before they wake up.

Taking his key off of the hook by the door, he exited the apartment and went across the hall.

Lydia and Malia had a larger apartment than the one Stiles and Scott shared with Liam and Theo. The perks of Lydia’s grandmother giving it to her, taking advantage of rent control laws. Stiles silently slinked into the kitchen and located the girls’ stash of the good stuff. He emptied a couple scoops into a plastic bag and placed the bag back on the shelf.

Stiles then turned around in time to see a naked Malia walking from the bathroom across the living room. The surprise of seeing one of his best friends in the buff caused him to scream in surprise. This then caused Malia to turn around, giving him the full view.

“STILES!” Malia screamed, grabbing a blanket off of the couch and covering herself up. “What the FUCK are you doing in our apartment?!”

“I just came to get some coffee,” Stiles stammered out as he held the baggie up. “We were out.”

“So you just decided to commit a B&E?!”

“I have a key! No breaking!” Stiles said quickly. He then looked toward the afghan Malia was covering herself with. “Uh,” he started. “I feel like I should give you a heads up here. That blanket has a fairly open weave. I can still see your uh…nippular areas.”

This comment was quickly met with a remote flying at Stiles’ head. Luckily, he ducked before it knocked him out, or worse. Malia had a lethal aim.

***

“So, he actually saw you naked?” Lydia asked Malia as she sat down beside her romate on the couch at the coffee shop they frequent.

“Yep,” Malia replied. “Head, shoulders, knees, and toes, and everything in between.”

“Okay, can I get my side of the story in?” Stiles asked from the chair beside the couch. “It was an accident. I was just getting some coffee because my lazy ass boyfriend thought it was shorter to put the empty can on the shelf than to drop it into the garbage can.”

“It’s not like he meant to do it,” Scott explained from his spot beside Stiles. “It’s not like he was across the street with binoculars and a box of donuts.”

“No, he was in my apartment,” Malia said. “That almost seems worse.”

Their friend Theo approached the group carrying a plate of cookies and sat them down on the table in front of the group. “Okay, there’s a lot of hostility coming from this area,” he said, standing back up and straightening up his apron. “There’s only one way  to resolve it.”

“What’s that?” Lydia asked. “Cause making Stiles buy me a new TV remote wasn’t the trick.”

“Since Stiles saw Malia’s boobies,” Theo started. “It would only be fair if she were to see his pee-pee.”

Stiles sat straight up. “Wait, what?”

“Yeah,” Malia smirked. “It’s only fair.”

“But I wasn’t even trying to—“ Stiles started to protest before he was cut off by Lydia.

“You weren’t trying, but it happened anyway, and she was embarrassed. This is the only way to set karma right.”

“Yeah, come on,”  Malia started. “Tit for tat.

Stiles crossed his legs. “Well, you’re not seeing my tat.”

***

 A couple days later, the matter was all but forgotten about as the gang moved on to new issues in their lives. At least they thought they had, until Malia snuck into the boys’ apartment one afternoon, to see Theo and his boyfriend Liam playing a spirited round of Mario Kart.

“Hey, boys,” she said, closing the door behind her. “Is that the shower I hear?”

“Yeah,” Liam answered. “I saw Stiles go in there a few minutes ago.”

“Really?” Malia asked with a curious tone. “Excuse me, guys.”

She moved toward the bathroom. “Thank you, lord, for this marvelous  opportunity,” she silently whispered as she opened the door. She then tiptoed past the pile of clothes on the floor, and wrapped her fingers around the shower curtain. “Ready or not, Stiles,” she announced before pulling the curtain back.

Only it wasn’t Stiles in the shower  at all.

“What the hell?!” Scott yelled, rinsing soap out of his face so he could get a better look at his intruder. “Malia?!”

Malia stood there, a look of shock on her face. “I’m sorry,” Was all she could say, as she backed out of the bathroom and closed the door. She then opened it and peeked her head in. “Uh, Mazel Tov.”

She turned around to see Stiles standing between the chairs Theo and Liam were sitting in playing their game.

“YOU!” Malia shouted, stalking toward Stiles. “YOU!”

“Me what?” Stiles asked, bewildered.

“YOU,” She said, jabbing a finger against his chest. “Were supposed to be IN THERE, so I could see YOUR THING!”

“Well, I’m sorry,” Stiles apologized. “My thing was in here with me.”

“This isn’t over,” Malia said. “Not by a long shot, this isn’t over.”

“You’re right about that,” Scott said, stepping out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. “You just gave me one against you.”

With a scream, Malia left the apartment.

***

Later that evening, Scott crept into the girls’ apartment and snuck up to the bathroom. “Sweet vengeance” He said, hearing the shower shut off. He threw open the door in tie to see  Lydia stepping out of the bathtub.

“GET THE FUCK OUT!” Lydia shouted as Scott quickly closed the door and ran back to his own apartment.

“How’d it go?” Stiles asked from his chair facing the TV.

“I may have made it worse,” Scott panted, as he closed the door and sat down beside him.

Suddenly, Lydia strode into the apartment and stood in front of the two boys, her bathrobe tied tight.

“Okay, listen, guys,” she said, with her arms behind her back. “This has to stop. It’s getting out of control.”

“I agree,” Stiles said with a sigh. “I feel somewhat responsible for this.”

“No, “ Lydia told him. “It’s perfectly normal to break into your neighbor’s apartment to steal coffee.” You could practically see the sarcasm dripping off of her words.

“Getting back to my earlier point, we need to end this whole thing. Now.” She pulled her arms out from behind her, and held out 4 bathrobes. “Put these on, and only these, give your roommates the other two, and meet in my apartment in 10 minutes.”

“Why Theo and Liam?” Scott asked, taking his robe.

“It was Theo’s dumbass idea to do this,” Lydia snarked as she walked back toward the door. “You now have 9 minutes.” She then left.

Stiles took two of the robes and headed toward Theo and Liam’s room. “I’ll go give the guys their robes.”

***

Exactly 9 minutes later, the four boys stood in Lydia and Malia’s living room, holding their bathrobes shut, their hearts pounding in suspense.

“Why am I here?” Liam asked, adjusting his robe a bit. “I didn’t see anyone naked.”

“I guess she wants it to be all fair,” Scott shrugged, as he noticed the bedroom door opening. Lydia and Malia stepped out, wearing robes themselves.

“So, I think this is the best solution to this problem,” Lydia said, as she put a hand on the draw string of her robe. “This way, nobody sees the wrong person.”

“Let’s just get this over with,” Stiles said, starting to untie his robe.

“How do we do this?” Scott asked.

“Count of three?” Liam suggested.

“Then we drop the robes at the same time,” Theo added.

“That works,” Malia said. “You guys ready?”

“Yeah,” The whole group answered in unison.

“Okay,” Lydia started. “One.”

They all untied their robes.

“Two.”

They let the robes hang loose.

“Three.”

All six robes hit the floor.

The End.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoyed it! Remember to comment and leave kudos!


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